How spiritual growth and personal development get stopped by blind spots
With Divine Openings, we're not always learning "lessons" (life is not an endless school in Divine Openings reality). We're not usually learning through struggle or pain or problems. We evolve, learn, and expand mostly through intention, with joy, and with ease and flow.
But we do learn something or get some value whenever there is struggle or a problem.... eventually, and without "work". After doing Divine Openings for a while, the only times we end up having struggle or hardship is when there's a particularly stubborn blind spot or some strong resistance. So we do sieze that opportunity to expand and unfold.
My first spiritual teacher, thirty years ago, said, "If you fall down, pick something up. You're down there anyway." Why not?
Clients sometimes say to me, "Oh, you're always blissed out!" What they really mean is, "You have it so much better than me. You're special - exempt."
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Or they're, in effect, saying they want their Instrument Panel to stop reading those lower vibrations, which frankly, you don't ever really want. If it did stop reading lower vibrations, you'd never know when you were going toward an outcome you're not going to like. Wanting to feel only bliss is a type of resistance to the full experience of life, and it will diminish your bliss!
I'm not always blissed out, and not in ease and flow each and every minute. I don't ever expect lower emotions to stop happening. This is a life of contrasts, we created it that way, and we wanted it that way. If we want to go back to no-contrast-land, that's easy, all we have to do is stop breathing.
The key to liberation is to embrace every feeling, every contrast, high or low, and it naturally rises. Bliss comes more often. Free will choice is a fabulous gift, and Divine Openings expands your ability to use it powerfully.
Like yours, my instrument panel readings can drop when some new volcano or earthquake of change is rumbling, and if I can't find and feel its source and let it move quickly. I may feel lower vibrations, lower emotions, or it can even escalate to physical pain and physical system breakdowns if I'm not able to let it flow and move soon enough.
That happened recently.
With Divine Openings, everything unfolds in due time, without work. Since Divine Openings I've lived a very happy, productive, prosperous, fulfilled life that gets more wonderful every year. There's been no working on myself; only living, sharing, creating, and expanding; even when the skies were occasionally cloudy, sunny skies always followed. There's no more rushing. Now is always enough, perfect or not.
There's always more expanding and unfolding to come. And that "due time" came due on something that's been a big mystery in my life for decades. I knew the subject of romantic relationships has been an area where I wanted more expansion, more joy, and more fulfillment. I knew there was a perfect unfolding going on, and that it's gotten a lot better.
Still, there was a repeating pattern in my relationships. It wasn't "bad", but it wasn't ever completely satisfying either. I was creating that aspect of my life to be just short of great. I'm accustomed to having a great life, and didn't plan on settling for anything less in that department!
On some level I'd decided to just wait to have another romance until this "blind spot" was cleared up. The last year and a half has been dedicated to enjoying other kinds of deep love and friendship, and getting very happy without a romance. I have a great life, am doing my work, playing, singing, writing songs, recording, creating, having fun, and am surrounded by love. It would actually be tough at this time to make room for a romantic relationship, because my energies are going elsewhere. But I wanted to eventually expand out of this blind spot..... in good time.
If you've done Divine Openings for long, you know the story isn't important. Our stories always sound like a variation on, "Here I am doing everything right, and it's not working out the way I want it. These people are showing up and doing things that don't make sense. I couldn't possibly be creating this. What the heck is going on???"
Blind spots are areas in your life where you can't see the forest OR the trees. You've been vibrating a certain way for so long, you simply cannot feel it, see it, sense it, and are oblivious that it's even there. It is so normal to feel that way that it doesn't stand out to you. If someone suggested it was there, you'd surely deny it.
Things you've been feeling since babyhood, and have been living unconsciously, often are not even on your radar. Those feelings are like the water a fish can't feel and isn't aware of. The fish doesn't know what water is! The bird doesn't know what air is. You don't often feel the clothes on your body. It fades out of awareness.
Of course it's super easy for me to read other people's blind spots like a book, and I can gently help them see it. I can see the sign on their forehead that says:
- "low self worth and doesn't know it"
- "angry deep down inside and doesn't know it"
- "too nice, a pushover, and doesn't know it"
- "pushing money away and doesn't know it"
- "numb and doesn't know it"
- "running 90 miles per hour from feelings and doesn't know it"
Blind spots mean you can't see the sign on your own forehead. It's attracting to you that thing you're vibrating, over and over, and you're absolutely mystified at what keeps showing up. You really innocently mean it when you say, "HOW am I attracting THAT???" "I'm not attracting that, dammit. I am a victim of that!"
Of course, this is not the route to liberation.
Like any human being, I have a blind spot or two as well remaining. And thank The Presence, a really big one just managed to surface. All in due time. It had waited until I got really happy alone. It had waited until I had enjoyed life and sailed some ecstatically smooth seas, and was finally ready. There is no rush to "get it all done". You can "endlessly process" yourself into constant misery. I stopped that years ago, and it's been great. I started enjoying the journey instead; creating joy instead of working on myself. The spiritual progress comes anyway! In due time.
Here's how it happened for me, and this is a pretty typical sequence of events. Your vibration feels a bit off. That's your Instrument Panel reading indicating a loss of altitude. Lower emotions creep in. If the emotions are in your blind spot, and it's hard to feel them, or if they've been buried deep and long, the body might begin to manifest problems to "escalate the feeling for you". Several physical problems cropped up for me all at the same time. That will get your attention every time. At the time, we're not always appreciative of that. (Understatement of the year.) Only later does the blessing of the bodily breakdowns become apparent.
I'd had company for five weeks, my long time friend (male) that I'm writing and recording songs with. His constant intense presence, the long hours, the highly emotional and powerful singing were stretching my very soul, and having less privacy and "space" were bringing out big emotions in me (not so appreciated at the time, but now I see the gift). I was thinking, "Hmmm, this is odd. I'm way more emotional than usual, less steady, and not bouncing back as quickly as usual." When I'd dive into feeling, he'd try to fix it, bless him. That was nice, but I didn't dive all the way in, by myself, and fully let go, until he left for a week.
I called upon another Divine Openings Giver to help me with the physical healing and relief, not knowing at the time that it all stemmed from things had been vibrating emotionally in me for so long that I didn't know they were there. Boy did she help get things moving! In a warm epsom salts bath she recommended, emotions violently volcanoed up. I was suddenly shocked at what was vibrating so strongly there inside me about relationships.
It wasn't pretty at all, but a lot of things about what I'd been creating in relationships finally made complete and total sense.
I was vibrating some very low things on that subject, due to some very painful and difficult conditioning and experiences around relationships early in life (the story is not important, the feelings were the liberating factor). Turns out I had a way less good attitude about it than I ever realized. All the smiles and good thoughts and good intentions I was constantly putting out there got diluted by that deep rumbling lower vibration. The SUM of all that was what I was broadcasting out there, and what got called to me was a mix of all those vibrations, higher and lower.
All my combined feelings were a perfect match for who I'd been attracting in relationships, for better and for worse. They were great in some ways, but not so great in other ways, and I'd always ask them to leave when it didn't improve. (Remember they were creating this for themselves too. I attracted men with their own brand of low vibration about relationship). I thought I'd been vibrating higher than that about it, and that's what had been so mystifying.
We always are creating it. Both people in the relationship are creating it, each from their own side. The Universe neatly and easily dovetails everything - matches you up perfectly. Nothing can change till the vibration changes. You can't make chocolate out of cabbage.
The emotional dam broke. I thought I was going to die, emotionally and physically. Several systems in my body had gone wacky over the last month, insuring that I didn't "miss" the signals this time. It literally broke me down, stopped me cold, so I had to just lie there and feel. Once that happened, massive vibrational shifts occured without work.
That's always your first clue to a blind spot: you don't recognize what you're vibrating, so what you attract mystifies you. It doesn't seem like you're creating it. Or you flatly deny that you could possibly be creating that.
Once this thing was over and I felt free, I joked with the Divine Openings Giver/healer who helped me, "Duh..... if I'd actually been vibrating only what I thought I was, I'd have been happily coupled long ago!" We had a good laugh. But it wasn't very funny there for awhile.
Please don't judge yourself for having blind spots or not being willing or able to find or feel them. Judging your resistance is adding resistance to resistance. You're human. They arise in due time, when you're ready, and when you've been doing Divine Openings for a while, you'll have the resources to deal with them, or the people who can help you are here.
No need to tell you what the specific feelings were, because that could distract you from the value for yourself. For you, it could be that you suddenly, for the first time, become aware of a "bottom of the Instrument Panel" reading of worthlessness.... you dive into it and move it, and lo and behold, your chronic fatigue goes away. Maybe anger you were unaware of for decades erupts like an earthquake, you move it and your serious heart problem disappears. You might experience rage that shocks you, and once it moves up the Instrument Panel you feel light, free, authentic, and no longer need to be "too nice", so you start saying exactly what you want, and people actually give it to you.
Our small selves hang onto those old vibrations, and actually try to seal them off, make it taboo, or tell you it's too scary to visit these dark caves guarded by dragons, motes with alligators, and trolls.
We've been conditioned to avoid those dark places. The signs all say: "All who try to pass here will die! Danger, turn back!" "You couldn't handle these feelings." "It's not you, it's their fault. Don't look in here whatever you do!"
One day you walk past the dragon, take the hit of the feeling, it moves up the Instrument Panel, and finally, even though it might not have felt pleasant, it's over, you feel good now, and everything finally makes sense. You see how you created it, and while it's not the prettiest story, at least you're free.
Appreciation rises in you. You thank your body, your emotions, your Instrument Panel, all those things you were blaming or cursing before.
The dragon unzips its dragon suit, it's really a prince or a princess. You dance with the trolls, swim in the mote, ride on the alligators, and you live happily ever after. Part of the adventure of life that you created.
I experienced my old lightness and bliss again after that volcano, felt fresh, washed, new, and hopeful about relationships in a way that I've never, ever felt it before. The physical things all cleared up very quickly. Something big has shifted.
It always seems so obvious in hindsight, but suddenly I saw that my relationship path has been very, very different than most people's, by my Large Self's design. There was nothing actually "wrong with it" at all. As often happens, though, when we compare our experience to what we think it's supposed to be like, we end up making our perfectly perfect experience somehow inadequate.
Clearly, for the first time, I saw The Presence has always lined up the perfect relationship for that stage of my life, mostly to support my work and theirs. The relationships were all designed not to last, because the next one would always fit perfectly with the next stage of my work. And since I change so fast, and the work changes so fast, the relationships played their role and I moved on. This is not everyone's path, but it was mine.
Thank God I've learned to my bones that it's not about "getting somewhere or someone", but about the delicious journey, and all the lovely stops on the way. I'm enjoying life, and happy. But there's a spark of positive expectation that burns bright like a star now. Like looking forward to Christmas as a child. What will it look like? I don't know, and it doesn't matter. It will be perfect, and now, I will be perfectly aware of how perfect it is, whether it fits the expectation I had or not.
So what is there to do? Keep living Divine Openings, and set the intention to unfold. Continue to live, love, and experience. If things don't move or resolve, and you're in a blind spot, you've hit a wall, and you're ready and willing to commit to move past it, a Divine Openings Giver or Lola can help you. They can see the sign on your forehead when you can't. How long it takes is up to you. They won't blurt it out - they'll help you feel it for yourself, so you're empowered.
How ready are you to move?
Life works, even when it looks like it's not working, if we let it.
Everything is alright.
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