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Long standing low vibration

I am writing because I have been doing Divine Openings for a long time and simply don't seem to let myself feel a lot of feelings. I am currently looking for a job and I can't seem to put myself into a since of awareness of which job is the best to go for. I'm in level one and reading the book. I listen to the audios every day, and read often. I'm numb to something and I'm not clear on what it is. When I go on runs, do non-habitual movement, or go on hikes, go to yoga class, or do yoga in my room I always feel better. If anyone has any advice for someone that is inhibiting feeling this deeply I would really appreciate it. ~Joanna
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Nothing to add to your wisdom and generosity

I have tears of joy reading what all of you are contributing to others. That's all. Nothing to add... what could I possibly add!!!

So much love,
Lola

Okay,

Okay, I'm applying for a job as a production line packer at a local garden center. There was a listing on craigslist and I emailed them today. Wish me luck!

What if feeling numbness is enough?

Hi Joanna, people have left great encouraging messages here, the thing that's just occurring to me is that feeling your numbness might be a great start, rather than a block? I know numbness isn't an emotional feeling but there's an awareness of a state of something. And then I was wondering what your feeling is in response to your awareness of the numbness and your current life situation? What I get from your words when I read your post is a sense of frustration. I don't know if this feels true to you but it prompted me to ask the question. It might be another way of feeling into things. Much love x

Joanna, I would like to also recommend

something. I know that for me, feeling was VERY hard to do, even after a steady dose of Divine Openings for almost 2-3 years. The first aid retreat for the Analytical Mind was amazing! It helped me to feel a great deal and relax about. Its main focus is getting you feeling, so even if you don't think you have an analytical mind, it's still a very helpful resource for thawing out. Good luck!

It CAN happen!

Hi Joanna, Just wanted to let you know for inspiration... I too really wanted to attend a 5-day since the moment I heard about Divine Openings. I thought due to money it would happen sometime far far in the future. Then Lola allowed people to begin doing payment plans if you registered early. Yahoo! And she had a 5 day coming up that just happened to be the exact week I was already off from work. Double yahoo! It was looking like this was meant to happen. So a few weeks after I'd already registered and made a payment, my boss calls a meeting and tells us that due a surplus in a program my school is involved with, we were all getting a bonus. Weird?! What's weirder is it was basically the exact amount I had left to pay to Lola (with a little extra for something fun for me!). So yes, believe it, it can happen. And no, my mind did not anticipate it happening the way it did. And yours probably won't either. Just know it can happen. Love, Mindy

Thank you each so much!

Thank you each so much for your soothing and helpful, wise words. I have read them over many times... Still feeling pretty confused money-wise. Finding the balance between letting things fall into place as Mindy recommended and actually taking physical steps to connect with opportunities is way confusing. Money needs to come in, but I know I'm inhibiting it... Luckily I've got great resources right now, regardless of my mental-emotional state-- a wonderful place to live (until Nov 14th) with every amenity I need, beautiful fall days-- here in Oregon fall is incredibly beautiful! This community is truly amazing. I am so inspired by all of your loving presence and support. I will be back to re-read these posts many more times as I let the Grace In. ps When the money starts flowing, which it could very fast if I commit-- I will certainly contact one of the Divine Openings Givers. I would also LOVE to attend the Five Day Intensive! ... *sigh* Thank you all again! Love, Joanna

Dear Joanna, You got some

Dear Joanna, You got some great suggestions from Samantha and the others. What I am finally picking up from Lola...and by the way I listen to her nearly every day to keep my vibration up....is that there's nothing to do. Relax, give yourself a big hug and a heavy dose of love, just as if you were a little girl getting a hug from your mom. We really are just like little children in this opening and enlightening. I also desperately needed to give myself a ton more love. While you do all the things you like to do that make you feel great, just rave about yourself and how well you have done in getting this far. You are an amazing creator. You have set your intention to feel your feelings and find the right work, and now you can let go. You will attract the job that makes you feel the best. I am sending you a huge, enormous Divine Mother hug that will comfort you. You have a stack of friends here, and you can be certain that you are supported and being held in perfect light and love. Soften and soothe yourself, soften and soothe again... You deserve it. Love and blessings, Grace

Agree!

Hi Joanna-There's really not much I can add to what Mindy and Samantha said. They put it so well. I was just going to suggest that if you are able, schedule a live Divine Openings session with Lola or with another Divine Openings giver. Lola talks about how this can push you out of feeling stuck. Just a thought. Hang in there and let it flow! It will move!!!!! - Tasha

Joanna

I've totally been where you are. I resisted feeling big time too! I have gotten better and better, but it has been gradual, so be easy on yourself and it will go easier too. Something from one of Lola's newsletters helps me when I can feel myself resisting, and that's to say YES (outloud or silently to yourself). To whatever it is. The thought you don't like... the painful feeling. I like to say it to myself in kind of a goofy voice to try to take the seriousness out of whatever it is that's bothering me. I would also suggest that you let go of trying to figure out what you're numb too. If you need to know, you'll know when the time is right. In the meantime, be kind to yourself. If runs, hikes and yoga help then do that and just trust things will fall into place the more you relax and let them. All the best, Mindy

low standing vibration

hi joanna, 'soften' is one of the mantras in lola's audios. i say it to myself as much as i can remember and it helps me to feel the stuff i've been avoiding for as long as i can remember. saying it really helps me to be honest with myself and to sink into my body and feel. hope that helps:), samantha